I’m listening to Fresh Air on NPR and the show is about treating pets with chronic illnesses. The doctor, Nancy Kay, author of “Speaking for Spot,” asks her human clients several questions as they consider chemotherapy. One of the questions is: “Will you enjoy the honeymoon?”

I don’t have any idea how long Mina will remain cancer free after tomorrow’s final chemotherapy treatment -her vets don’t have any idea, either. I asked my friend Sue the other day if she thought I’d be relieved and happy after the chemo was over and she didn’t think so. She said I’d miss the weekly reassurance of Mina’s CBC and physical exams to let me know how her cancer was doing.

She’s right, of course, as anyone who knows me would say. I want to enjoy Mina’s “honeymoon.” I want to enjoy every single minute of her cancer-free life for as long as it lasts. This is going to take a lot of effort on my part not to scrutinize her every behavior for signs of the cancer’s return and spend so much time worrying about it that I miss the good things.

I plan to keep this blog going for as long as it feels right. If you see me slipping into bad habits and worrying Mina into an early grave, feel free to deliver a virtual slap upside the haid. I made this choice for Mina because I want her to have some life without pain or suffering. I want her to stick her head out the window of our car when we drive back roads and eat because she enjoys eating and take walks because she loves loves loves being outside. I want to lay beside her on the floor and rub her tummy and smile when she licks my nose. I want to see her silly side when we’re playing and see her face when she makes me laugh. I want Mina to know that I love her more than anything in this world.

s.

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